I found a book that I absolutely love! I have read it and taken notes on it and have since passed it along to a friend who says she loves it as well! The title is Dear God Why Can't I Have a Baby?
This book takes you step by step the process you will probably go through (deciding to try, just seeing what will happen, charting, OPK, why aren't we getting pregnant, doctor's etc). The author and her daughters all three struggled getting pregnant and all three provide excerpts from their journals during that time. In addition there are a lot of stories from other women that really helped me to realize the emotions I was/am having are completely normal and to be expected. Different chapters will hit home for different women depending on their situation (secondary fertility for one does not hit home with me but does with my friend). If you are looking for a good book I strongly recommend this one! If anyone else has read it I would love to hear what you thought about it.
The title is perfect to me! Isn't that the question we ask over and over. God I feel like I am doing everything right, I am trying to follow your plan so why is it not happening? While the book does not give an exact answer as to why (who could really do that over than God himself) it really helps to show that God has a plan and everything is happening according to HIS will not ours. The book really made me realize that there is a reason we are going through this. DP and I have talked about it so much, including again last night. We don't know why we were choosen by God to go through this, but we are really starting to believe that we were choosen by God to go through this. The purpose maybe so we will adopt children, as we have always been very open to this idea. Maybe the purpose is for us to minster to other young couples who are going through it. Maybe it is for me to focus my career not only on women's health but on fertility issues and educating women and the general public. Whatever the reason is, we believe there is a reason and we trust that God will never give us more than we can handle!
"Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails." Proverbs 19:21