Day 1: Sunrise in Sanibel, Florida July 2011
This photo was taken during vacation with DeWayne's family in the summer of 2011. This was the summer before I went of birth control and we started to "try". I am not a morning person so to be honest this was the only sunrise photo I could find that took.
My grief for Jackson has really changed over the past 2.5 months. While I miss him dearly and wish things had been different, I know he is in such a better place. I do not cry for him very often anymore. I can talk about him and smile with no tears. I can and do look at his pictures often. I have a peace about his passing and that is really what I see in this picture. It is a peaceful picture, as we were headed out on the boat before dawn to fish, just DeWayne and I. The water was calm, there was a breeze, and the world was still sleeping. All was peaceful. I know the sun will come up and that with it may come a stormy day full of emotions, but right now it is dawn, beautiful, and peaceful and I am enjoying it.
I have not really posted a lot publicly about Jackson. All of our close friends of course know and we had posted an announcement on Facebook, but I have not mentioned anything on there since he was born. Today for the first time, I posted this exact picture on Instagram. I captioned it and used the #captureyourgrief. It felt good to be more open and more public about it. Maybe over this month I can open up even more.